"As life was five" poem commentary

Jimmy Santiago Baca, an author who in everyone's eyes he is an amazing poet. Baca has written many inspiring quotes, but as we read them we realize there is something wrong in him, his writing is sad almost depressing as he writes about his childhood, his family, and his life in jail.

As I read his poem "As life was five" I start thinking about my own family my own troubles and my own childhood, growing up in a family that didn't always have everything they needed. 

In this poem Baca is speaking of his grandfather, how embarrassed he was by the man that wouldn't give him a loan for his land. He speaks of his grandfathers feeling how he couldn't bare Baca seeing him be embarrassed as he was speaking to the man at the store, as the man was being cruel because he didn't speak english. Baca "insulting my grandpa because he couldnt speak, english", is astonishing how baca remembers so much from his childhood when so many events have occurred since then.

Photo by: tim brownson

A Daily Joy To Be Alive

No matter how serene things 

may be in my life, 
how well things are going, 
my body and soul 
are two cliff peaks 
from which a dream of who I can be 
falls, and I must learn 
to fly again each day, 
or die. 

Death draws respect 
and fear from the living. 
Death offers 
no false starts. It is not 
a referee with a pop-gun 
at the startling 
of a hundred yard dash. 

I do not live to retrieve 
or multiply what my father lost 
or gained. 

I continually find myself in the ruins 
of new beginnings, 
uncoiling the rope of my life 
to descend ever deeper into unknown abysses, 
tying my heart into a knot 
round a tree or boulder, 
to insure I have something that will hold me, 
that will not let me fall. 

My heart has many thorn-studded slits of flame 
springing from the red candle jars. 
My dreams flicker and twist 
on the altar of this earth, 
light wrestling with darkness, 
light radiating into darkness, 
to widen my day blue, 
and all that is wax melts 
in the flame- 

I can see treetops!

This poem represents everything that jimmy had to go through in jail as he runs into many new opportunities as he leaves to start his new life eventhough there are the events in the past that torture him, he moves on when he sees the outside. 

new commitments

When first starting the 6 needs test I looked at the needs and believed  I would have different results, when I saw my results I noticed my top need was for significance at 93%. Even though the results said my top need was significance I didn't know exactly what it meant so I went to the interpretation page. I read that my beliefs are to feel important and unique and maybe even a bit feared, and I started to ponder that it is true in every situation I feel the need of being respected and being recognized. Even though all my my scores were pretty high I noticed that Love-Connection was the lowest coming in at 46% which at first I believed would be the highest.

Reading more and more I realize that most of what has to do with significance has to do with respect and being heard and I mean I'm all for it but it might be a bit too much as to say Im not as concerned with so much as they say "being obeyed", everyone who knows me knows I can be shy and not at all a person who looks to being obeyed. For the most part I believe this test has actually helped to learn a bit more about myself.

My 6 needs results 

As I go on I realize that I make really poor choices in every sense. I don't believe I'm fulfilling my needs so well as of my peers, I more push them away because I sometimes feel like I have more important things to acquire or that they are getting in my way. Since I go to school full time and work part time it is difficult to have other activities as I used to have as some of my needs. As I think about it over the past three years my needs have changed as I have progressed my activities have gone and my stress has risen.

I have already made a commitment to socialize more this year as well as to keep up with school, but to do that I'm going to need to bring out my needs to make those major changes in my life. As the interpretation says in page 6"I need to get involved in experiences where I won’t get any admiration or special respect. I need to work less and love myself more. I need to indulge in pleasurable experiences just for the sake of pleasure. I need to relax. I need to pay attention to feelings and relationships." And it is so.

For this new year I have also made a commitment to read more this last year I had so far read 6 books that I have finished which include:

• jumping off swings
• the giver 
• blackmailed merger 
• where she went 
• extremely loud & incredibly close 
• just listen 

While reading those at the beginning of the school year we made a commitment to read a certain amount of books and I had said 16, while now I believe I can read more. I have realized I need to read every night if I'm going to accomplish that goal for myself. 

When ever I read a book so tragic like Sarah's Key I can almost imagine it happening. Sarah went through horrible things to get to her brother that almost no one could relate to, but being so horrible there are things that aren't similar but in a way they are. As I see our society now there are still people who would cheer one the nazi's but not to an extent to execute so many jewish families for no reasonable purpose. there are people I imagine just like Sarah who would fight for all they have to save a beloved.

#OneLittleWord

My #OneLittleWord for 2015 is reimagine. I chose reimagine because it is what I want to do really with everything I believe in and even how I see things. I have always seen things in a negative way and I have always judged people that I don't even take the time to know because I feel like I already know how they are. This year maybe things could change to where no one is judged in a way that isn't unfair for them. I'd like to reimagine my way of thinking and my perspective on things.

Peer preassure

When someone tells you "hey lets cut math and go to a movie", can you simply say no would you cut simply because you cant say no to your bestest of friends.

Ive known a lot of people that cant handle their feelings who always have to say yes because they are afraid of what would happen, what someone could do to them because they didnt listen.

Me myself have gone theough that because in elementary I was the person who wanted to get along with everyone. I always had to do things that I knew wernt right because I wanted everyone to like me. In fifth grade Iwas speaking to my friend while I wasnt suppose to that got me and my friend in trouble, we got a week of punishment, and in that week it was when I realized that I didnt need to do what other people wanted me to do to fit in. After that experience everything started to change because I made the choice to stop listen to the people who were making my life worse for myself.

Saying that everyone who goes through people pressuring them  everyday need to find their self-esteem and realize that that isnt them because when they are older they will face more challenges to deal with.

Alcoholism

Alcohol abuse has always been a problem in america, too many people are dependent on alcohol. Some people might not realize that it is actually hurting them health wise. While its shown that while on alcohol people act differently as getting into fights, causing a car crash and many other things caused because while drunk people tend to have slurred vision and a curved mind.

 In personal experience I have gone through having someone in my family being an alcoholic, my father used to always drink, when I had to be with him especially in a car I was always scared something would happen, even though he gad always been a good driver I knew the effects of drinking which made me worry the most. It took my father to have a stroke before he could realize that drinking isn't a good thing.

 There are always options for people who drink it is on them if they dont take advantage and rid of the substance that's killing them. There is always that person who believes their body and mind dont change when they drink some people might get away with it, but it does affect everybody and it is harmful for everybody.

 There needs to be a way to make people understand that drinking isn't the right thing, they cant wait until something horrible happens to them. We need to find a solution to alcohol abuse.

Our rights

How do we know if our vote actually counts? What secures us of our liberty? What we all want to know is how the voting process actually works because there is nothing that we can trust to be sure our vote counts.

Today as I was driving to school I was listening to the radio, there was a story about election day the woman was saying she went to vote just yesterday. When she went to vote someone gave her a code so she could vote, after she had voted they asked for the code back. when she found out that greg abbott had won by a long shot, he won by more than 50%, everyone was shocked the lady on the radio said she started to think maybe the scores were fixed. How could greg abbott win by so much while he was hated by so many texans? Thats what everyone wants to know.

While they were talking in the radio they mentioned how the statistics showed that it was going to be a close one because Wendy Davis and Greg Abbott were supported by so many people, it couldn’t be possible that the voting showed such a difference from what everyone thought. The score 59% to 39% how is that possible, some people say it was fixed others say differently. 

It might also tie in with the fact that not everyone votes or that for some reason A lot of people changed their mind last minute. Not everyone believes abbott was the best opponent for Davis because they had such different opinions on how Texas should be ran. You could say that people electing Abbott for our new governor because he promised to create new jobs, enforce our rights and other things but should we believe his words.